I’ve been told, have read about several times, and have begun to feel compelled that keeping a blog of my pregnancy, and probably also what comes after, is a good idea. For me, for my family, and eventually for the Little Z to come.
Little Z’s could also refer to the amount of sleep I’m starting to wean to, and I’m sure the amount of sleep I should expect soon!
So for my first post I’ll share the story of how I learned I was pregnant:
It was late November, and my tummy had hurt a few times and I had been a little more tired than usual (both chalked up to holiday overeating), and my period was a few days late (which had been happening regularly since Wedding Planning had increased the stress level of my life, and it refused to return to its regularly scheduled
programming timing), but otherwise nothing was alarming. However, my nose had been congested for several weeks, and often I had green snot (sorry, but it’s part of the story!) but hadn’t felt any of the symptoms that typically go with being sick.
One evening, a few days after Thanksgiving, I decided to google it, and typed in “Green Snot”. The auto-suggestions that google lists said something like, “green snot means…” and the one below was “green snot in babies” and my mind combined the two lines to read “green snot means babies”. A click occurred in my head, and while I quickly corrected how I was reading google’s recommendations, I did decide that maybe I should look into this. I took a pregnancy test and lo and behold it said positive. I ran downstairs and unceremoniously showed Eric with “this is why I’ve been so tired!” to which he replied, “how accurate is this thing?”
Yes, that was his reply, and even up until the doctor confirmed the pregnancy he had a hard time believing it. In fact, I think the first time he started thinking that this might be a real thing was when he accompanied me to my first ultrasound at 9 weeks, and he got to see a blob on screen. Even then his comment was jokingly, “that could be stock footage.. it doesn’t look like anything.” To be fair, most of this callous attitude is for my benefit. We’ve known many many couples who joyfully shared their pregnancy news only to shortly thereafter miscarry and be devastated. Eric was trying to protect me from getting my heart broken, and wouldn’t let me get too wrapped up in ‘being pregnant’ until I reached the safer zone of second trimester.
I will add, however, that this did not deter him from buying baby toys during Christmas, which was only slightly contradictory to his suggestion I not get my hopes up too early. 😛
Also contradictory was him telling me not to tell too many people, and yet I learned later that most of his co-workers knew well before I was at the safety mark. I do know why he suggested I keep quiet, I don’t think I would have coped well with having to tell everyone, “nevermind.. false alarm”.
I love my husband, he cares deeply for me and wants to protect me, which is why it’s so easy to overlook his hypocrisy in times like this. Even during his initial doubt, he has been incredibly supportive, taking over certain responsibilities (like kitty litter) without me ever asking, agreeing to buy any food I want that I claim will make me and the baby healthier, and painstakingly searching for the absolute best prenatal vitamins he can find.
I’m just glad that we’re now in the second trimester, and I pray that we make it full term with a healthy baby 🙂