Life is changing…

Monthly Archives: July 2013

Checked into the hospital last night and after all the exams and questions and whatnot, they put a tiny pill in my cervix to induce labor. After careful monitoring, painful IV injection (took three tries), and lots of talks and explanations, they finally left us to try to sleep close to 2am. Of course I couldn’t because it felt like really strong menstrual cramps, coupled with fear, stress, and a lot of hip pain.

Unfortunately the baby didn’t like the medicine. The nurse came in throughout the night to make me flip sides several times, or to help me to the restroom what seemed like every hour (had to unhook a lot of stuff! I kept trying to hold out so Eric could get some sleep but the IV stuff just goes straight through me), and eventually came in with a flock of others to tell us that the medicine had worked too well and my contractions were too long and close together which was cutting off supply to baby and causing her trouble. So I got a new shot to cancel the effects. Note: needle count is currently at 4

Around 7 my heart stopped pounding and racing from the new medicine and I was finally able to sleep…until about 9 when the next series of trials began. They decided that since we couldn’t induce using drugs they’d try a mechanical method. They told me about this balloon that they’d put in the cervix and fill with fluid to get it to stretch. It had a formal name but to me I heard Wooly Bugger. So they kept telling me about the Wooly Bugger, how it would work, that it would have tension outside and would pull against my cervix from inside until I dialated to 3 cm at which time it would fall out.

Unfortunately they had a dickens of a time getting it in because apparently I have a narrow pelvis. After three very painful attempts of people putting it in for it to fall out too soon because it wasn’t far enough back, they gave up.

Now we’re trying pitocin to get contractions going. So freakin painful.

And, unfortunately (my favorite word today), sometimes the baby is in trouble after a contraction is finished which indicates that it may be a placenta issue, which they can’t fix like they could if it was her on cord or something like that.

The nurse has been super pro natural, per my birth plan and trying to support me, and was out to prove the doctor wrong that I can do it on my own (doc worried about pelvis size) but she’s starting to change teams and is apologizing saying that first priority is healthy baby, no matter how we get her out.

So I guess its wait and see a little longer, but I haven’t gone past 1.75 cm yet and the baby seems ill inclined to help and I hurt a lot from all the contractions and checking and lying only on left side and poking and prodding…

Advertisements

I can’t sleep. I’m not sure if its because I keep having Braxton Hicks contractions, or that I’m hungry, or is it just because I’m nervous because I know what’s coming.

Today the OBG decided that I’ll be induced tomorrow night, which means sometime in the following day or two I’ll have a baby.

I’m not sure what scares me the most; knowing there’s a long road of pain and struggle and uncertainty ahead, or knowing that at the end there will be a new member of our family that’s going to change everything.

The OBG decided that they didn’t want to wait any longer for her to make her appearance as she’s not getting any smaller and my pelvis isn’t getting any bigger. That this is what worries them concerns me.

This evening as I was putting up truffula trees in the nursery, Eric came in and started talking in earnest about names. He also dragged me and his mom out to go to Sam’s to get stuff (his mom has the membership), and has plans for tomorrow to go find a rug for the baby’s room so that it can be complete (and so he can move the rocker/recliner up there). I told him to not pack too much into the day, that everything I’ve read and heard has said to take it easy right before labor to conserve energy. I think he kinda gets it but he’s so focused on getting things “done” before she arrives that it takes some precedence in his thoughts. He had previously planned a game night with his brother and sister-in-law which, once we learned about the planned induction, he just moved up some so that we can still do that and then head off to the hospital. I’m actually ok with that because I think it will be fun and relaxing and will take my mind off of the evening and day to come. Otherwise tomorrow is going to be extremely long and a torturous wait.

Maybe Eric’s plans for the day aren’t so un-thought-out. Now if I could just manage to fall asleep…


The wait continues. I receive numerous calls and texts and emails asking if she has arrived, but must answer in the negative, much to the chagrin of the asker. It has become uncomfortably clear by the sound of their voice, the look in their eyes, or the underlying meaning in their text or notes, that their greatest fear for this baby, is being the last to find out. It has been suggested, rather emphatically, that I have a plan in place to contact and notify each of the time and name and other important details. While not quite threatened outright, I fear what may happen if someone is left out, or potentially worse, informed later than their ranked significance should allow. I may need to develop a plan of attack via spreadsheet and phone tree. Or just assume that Eric is capable of making important calls while I envelop myself the new life.

Another concerning matter that has developed is keeping the cat from claiming all of the baby’s paraphernalia. She repeatedly shows an assumption that if it is soft, or in a reachable spot, or simply exists, that it must be hers. Today she accidentally discovered the bouncer by missing her original destination when jumping and has since decided that it is more satisfactory than was her original destination, and is now her favorite napping spot in the house, which incidentally is in her favorite room in the house, which is of course the baby’s room.

Have had to cover it with a piece of fabric to reduce hair and, as recently discovered, cat drool.

gkbouncer

(not the intended use of this product)


Yesterday I slept through my alarm. I had been up a good portion of the night worrying about the baby. I had woken up some time in the wee hours, gotten up to use the restroom, and then upon returning to bed waited to feel the usual kicks from the baby. She usually wakes up any time I do anything, and is usually very active nearly all the time. I’m so used to, when I roll over and cram a pillow under my side, that she’ll start kicking and pushing against it. But nothing happened. My belly was utterly still.. in fact I couldn’t even feel her all crammed up on one side or the other, or sticking out anywhere, or anything. The whole belly was softish and I couldn’t feel a baby in there at all. I poked, prodded, shook the belly, wiggled around, and continued to try to wake her for a really long time before I got a tiny bit of response from her. But it was only a few kicks and that was it. I was worried, but decided that she had in fact moved, so she must be ok, and I had an appointment in the morning so could ask about it then. But of course it was nearly impossible to fall back asleep, and I was hungry to boot, but tried to sleep instead of getting up and eating something. Finally I guess I did fall back asleep.

So after oversleeping my alarm I jumped out of bed, went through the morning routine super fast, threw some clothes on and rushed out the door to my appointment which I was going to be late for.

Once there, after all the normal tests and whatnot they hooked me up to the non-stress test (NST) thing, as always. The OBG had already done the exam and determined that I was not dilating and no progress was being made, and also made the comment (again) about how narrow my pelvis is.  She also asked, “didn’t I see something written that we weren’t going to let you go past term?” which I had not heard, but she sent me off to the NST thing while she went and called the doctor at the hospital who had done my ultrasound/bio-screen and had recommended the NST thing in the first place.

Well unfortunately the baby decided not to move while we were hooked up. Despite all the tests always coming back super positive with regards to how healthy the baby and I are, excepting the high fluid levels, this made the OBG worried. I told her about my night, and how I had worried about the baby’s unresponsiveness, and she asked kind of casually, “what are your plans for the rest of the day?” (this at 9 something in the morning). I said “… work..” and she said, “I want you to go to the hospital.”

This shocked me some and she explained that she wanted me to go check into Labor and Delivery, let them monitor me and determine if the baby is ok, etc. She said any number of things could come of that, that I might be induced, scheduled for c-section, sent for another ultrasound bio-screen exam, or they might just send me home. I asked somewhat nervously if I should go home first and get my things and she said, “No, go straight to the hospital. Your husband can meet you there and bring your things.” But in nearly the same breath she told me to go make another appointment with them for Friday, in case I was sent home.

So I shakily checked out, made the Friday appointment, got into the car, and called Eric. And like a good obedient patient, I started driving towards home instead of towards the hospital (which is for the most part on the way). I was so nervous all I could think was that I wanted Eric with me. I asked him, “she told me to go to the hospital but it would be ok if I came home and got you first, right?” and he replied that he would hurry up and get ready. I arrived home about 10 min later and went and grabbed my bag, checked that I had all the things I might want with me, and you know.. started the dishwasher, started picking stuff up.. I also grabbed a granola bar because by then I was starving, having not eaten breakfast in my mad rush out the door.

Meanwhile Eric was running around throwing things in a bag, yelling out, “where’s my wallet?..” and other such things. I went and waited in the car and he came out to get going but forgot something, and he literally had to run back into the house three or four times before we were on our way. It was really kinda cute to see him slightly panicked over us potentially having a baby really soon. Although, we did go off and leave the car seat, but with the hospital not that far away it wouldn’t have been a big deal for him to come home to gather whatever was forgotten, or even have his parents bring it to us.

That time of morning rush hour was over, so it didn’t take very long to get there, and we went up to Labor and Delivery and checked in. The admin lady at the desk took us to the Triage room where I’d be monitored, and gave me a robe and bags for my clothes and a pee cup and all kinds of paperwork, then put her hand on my arm, looked me in the eyes and said, “take a deep breath, it’s all going to be ok.” To which I nervously giggled and tried to do.  She propped up the pillows so I could sit and fill out the paperwork, then left us alone, but I had barely started to fill out the first form before a nurse came in and started hooking up their NST device to me (it’s really just straps around my belly that measures contractions and baby’s heartbeat and stuff), along with taking blood pressure and temperature and all kinds of other things. At the same time a resident came in and asked a billion questions, so there was all this mad flurry over me for about 10 minutes, then they disappeared.

Well at that point I was back to reclining and couldn’t sit up because of the stuff on me, so had to try to fill out the paperwork by holding it up and filling it out against my hand. Meanwhile Eric tried to help by adjusting the tray thing but couldn’t get it any closer, and decided to just watch me bemusedly instead.

Then we waited. I sat and stared at the wall thinking about what could be wrong, if the placenta had shut down or the baby was in fetal distress.. what if I had to go get a c-section, what if what if what if.

Somewhere during all this time, the baby decided to kick me a few times. That made me feel better, but I was already nervous about what they were going to do with me.

I have no idea how much time passed. We had conversations about whether there truly was a baby in there, or if it was just cupcakes, and if I was even capable of ever having the baby or if she was going to be stuck inside me for eternity…

Periodically the resident would pop her head in and ask another question, and at some point the admin lady came and collected my paperwork and I apologized for how messy it was to which she sweetly replied that it was no problem at all.

Finally the nurse came back in, started unhooking me from the NST thing and said, “the baby’s beautiful! Everything’s great. I’ll get your discharge papers.”

…  So.. that was it? All that fuss and rush and scariness and they basically decided that nothing was wrong and I should just go home?

She bluntly told me, “you don’t want to be induced anyway, it makes it take two days if they have to induce you.” (!! not cool)

By that time I had worked myself up that we would be having the baby today, and in fact I had called my co-worker to tell her all the events of the morning on our way to the hospital, and she had said, “if she’s not moving around anymore you’re having that baby today.” So to just be given the boot from the hospital was somewhat anticlimactic.

It was about noon by the time we checked out so Eric took me out to lunch. It took way longer than I had anticipated, and by the time we got home and I logged into my computer most of the day was over. It was really hard to focus on work at that point, and I had to notify everyone of the events of the morning, and I think they were all a little disappointed that “we” hadn’t had a baby. My boss also sent an email saying it would be ok if I just worked from home for the rest of the week, which I fully intend to do (after coming in today for one last time to ensure I finished up some things I want to finish).

So yeah. I think people were disappointed to see me in the office today. Although I must say, I really enjoy people’s reactions when they ask, “when are you due?” and I reply, “this past Sunday.”

Oh! And to make things even more awesome, the whole way home from the hospital, all yesterday evening and last night, and all this morning, guess who can’t sit still again and has resumed using me as a punching bag?


Is this ok? Or have I gone off the deep end? It seemed like a wonderful idea when I put it in my lunch this morning.. and it’s delicious… so… I think it’s a good idea.

nutellaraspberries

Maybe next time I’ll be a bit more sanitary (no one eats this stuff but me, so I think it’s ok.. though I’ve never just taken a spoon/fork to it directly before… not sure why not…) and go this route: Nutella and Raspberry Sandwiches


Eric apparently caused a ruckus in the neighborhood today. He had put all of the wood packing materials that came with the baby’s furniture outside, with the regular branches and wood for fires, but it had drawn some mites or something. He decided he’d rather burn and destroy this stuff instead of bagging it up and bringing it and its infestation into the house (garage), which I completely agree with.

So he got out the fire pit and started burning this stuff, which apparently caused a bit of smoke because it was damp or rotten or something.

He said he sat out there for two hours in the heat monitoring this stuff, before deciding it had burned down low enough, and was no longer smoking, so that he could go inside and work on hanging curtain rods in the baby’s room.

The baby’s room has the absolute best view in the entire house of the backyard, and so he could see down at the fire pit and that it was fine, but at some point he was not near the window and when he looked back the fire had been put out and there was water on the ground. He had literally been inside for less than five minutes when this happened.

Eric ran outside to find out why one of our neighbors would trespass to put out our fire, only to discover a fire engine out front. Apparently a lady down the street had seen the smoke, asked the UPS delivery guy if we were home, to which he had answered that no one answered the door when he delivered packages (because Eric was outside at that time, monitoring the fire), and she had noticed that Eric’s car, which is usually so prevalent right in front of our house, was gone (because I had driven it to work). So she did the neighborly thing and called the fire department because clearly our house was on fire and we weren’t home.

So Eric had to explain to the chief why he was burning something, clarify that he hadn’t actually done anything wrong because it was in an enclosed fire pit (with the screen cover on), and was technically being monitored if you exclude the minute or so he took his eyes off of it.

Eric did talk to that neighbor and thanked her for caring enough to check and call, and it sounds like he had a chat with the other neighbors as well, with the one two doors down yelling over, “Eric? Are you still outside? Just wanted to make sure you were keeping an eye on your fire” and such.

It’s funny that while he’s at home during the day so much is going on. It’s like an episode of Housewives or something, except I know that most of them are men, which makes it all the more interesting.

So now Eric has to figure out what to do with his soppy wooden mush mess.


I had to drag myself out of bed this morning, force myself to take a shower, compel myself to put together some semblance of a lunch, push myself out the door, and even then I didn’t drive in the exact direction of work.. it went more along the lines of looking for something tasty and awakening for breakfast instead of worrying about getting to work on time. Which I didn’t. But I made sure to notify my co-worker that I wouldn’t be in on time, but that it wasn’t due to a baby or doctor’s appointment.

Sigh

I shouldn’t feel this way until I’m past my due date, but darnit if the timer hasn’t dinged and the oven’s ready to spit this baby out. If I hear one more reference to “popping” I think I’ll … I dunno.. blow a gasket.. not quite pop the way they mean, you know?

And to make me feel worse, I asked about another girl in the office who had a baby a year or so ago, who went two weeks past her due date – I asked if she seemed “ready” and was pouty/cranky during that time and my co-worker said that no, she had been super chipper the whole time, which I guess was a little unnerving. So now I feel bad for not being super upbeat… stupid other girl…  😉

And apparently the race is on. Our admin lady’s daughter is due two weeks after me and we keep getting updates on progress she’s making; now there are bets being placed on whether she’ll beat me or not.

Sigh

Come on little baby. We’re all ready for you – your room is almost done, we’ve got diapers and clothes and stuff for you, and we’re really eager to meet you! You don’t have to wait until your due date.. you can come visit any time now 🙂