I can’t sleep. I’m not sure if its because I keep having Braxton Hicks contractions, or that I’m hungry, or is it just because I’m nervous because I know what’s coming.

Today the OBG decided that I’ll be induced tomorrow night, which means sometime in the following day or two I’ll have a baby.

I’m not sure what scares me the most; knowing there’s a long road of pain and struggle and uncertainty ahead, or knowing that at the end there will be a new member of our family that’s going to change everything.

The OBG decided that they didn’t want to wait any longer for her to make her appearance as she’s not getting any smaller and my pelvis isn’t getting any bigger. That this is what worries them concerns me.

This evening as I was putting up truffula trees in the nursery, Eric came in and started talking in earnest about names. He also dragged me and his mom out to go to Sam’s to get stuff (his mom has the membership), and has plans for tomorrow to go find a rug for the baby’s room so that it can be complete (and so he can move the rocker/recliner up there). I told him to not pack too much into the day, that everything I’ve read and heard has said to take it easy right before labor to conserve energy. I think he kinda gets it but he’s so focused on getting things “done” before she arrives that it takes some precedence in his thoughts. He had previously planned a game night with his brother and sister-in-law which, once we learned about the planned induction, he just moved up some so that we can still do that and then head off to the hospital. I’m actually ok with that because I think it will be fun and relaxing and will take my mind off of the evening and day to come. Otherwise tomorrow is going to be extremely long and a torturous wait.

Maybe Eric’s plans for the day aren’t so un-thought-out. Now if I could just manage to fall asleep…

Advertisements